Pabst Blue Ribbon - Pabst Brewing Company

    Just like ironic facial hair, fixed-gear bikes, and bands that don't even exist yet, Pabst Blue Ribbon has been a mainstay of hipsters for years. Now that I live in Chicago's most hipster neighborhood, it was only a matter of time before this review happened. I debated not even reviewing the beer, seeing as it's so popular nowadays..

    PBR is brewed by the Pabst Brewing Company, located in Los Angeles, California. The beer is an Adjunct Lager, using large amounts of corn in the brewing process rather than all barley.

    The beer pours a golden straw color with a thin foam capping it. This brew is super-clear with lots of bubbles rushing to the top of the cup. A thin film of bubbles on top of the beer stays around for a surprisingly long time for a macro brew. These bubbles clearly don't realize foam isn't cool anymore.

    PBR's aroma is very faint, but light malts and sour corn make up what odors can be smelled. To it's credit, the beer actually smells more like beer than other macros which tend to just smell like soda water.

Hipsters only drink warm beer, they grab it before it's cool.

    The Adjunct Lager is medium-light bodied with a medium level of carbonation. There is a bit of a wateriness to the beer, but it is also strangely syrupy. Even more confusing, the beer finishes extremely dry, just like the hipster sense of humor. There is an alcohol content of 4.74% ABV in the brew.

     Pabst Blue Ribbon's flavor has plenty of sweet grain flavor. I'm surprised the beer finishes so dry with how sweet the flavor starts. There really isn't any hops flavor worth mentioning here. The large amount of corn used in the brewing of this Adjunct Lager becomes obvious with the pronounced, roasted corn flavor of the beer. In fact, this is the corniest tasting beer I've ever had. Don't hipsters know that the use of corn hasn't been "underground" since the early 2500's BC?

    Overall, PBR is actually a bit better than some American macro brews. The corn flavor can be a bit off-putting at first as it's so strong, but you eventually settle on it just like most other things in life. I suppose if you're looking for a cheap, ok-tasting beer (or if you're a hipster), PBR isn't a terrible choice. I can only hope that hipsters eventually move on to local craft beer instead of this, but until then I'll keep blaming Frank Booth from Blue Velvet for causing my neighborhood to be inundated with PBR cans...

Amulets and Ale Rating:

(I would have rated it higher if it weren't so mainstream..)

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Rolling Rock Extra Pale - Latrobe Brewing Co.

    Rolling Rock Extra Pale is an Adjunct Lager brewed by Latrobe Brewing Co. (now owned by Anheuser-Busch) which is located in St. Louis, Missouri. We needed a lager for a shrimp boil recipe and the wife picked this one up. We have a bit of a soft spot for these "tallboy" cans, so that likely factored into the choice.

    Rolling Rock Extra Pale lives up to its name in color as it pours a very pale straw color. The beer appears to be very effercescant and features a large, white head. The head has very low retention, however, and leaves nothing on the glass.

    This Adjunct Lager barely has any smell to it at all. What little scent there is comes off as light malts. Slightly sour corn notes can be detected, though very lightly. If I were to venture a guess, there was very little malt put into brewing this beer.

    Rolling Rock Extra Pale is light bodied and almost watery in mouthfeel. The medium-low carbonation level enhances the mouthfeel and makes the beer feel a bit fuller bodied. The beer has an alcohol content of 4.6% ABV.

A rolling rock gathers no moss, but it sure does ruin a beer.

    The Adjunct Lager's flavor is extremely light. What flavor there is in the beer is that of grains, mainly corn. There is next to nothing as far as hops flavor.

    The name Rolling Rock can't help but make me think of Raiders of the Lost Ark. My mind starts at the picture over there --> and then goes to the glass of beer being the idol on the pedestal. Indy looks at the beer, he smells the light adjunct grains and grimaces. He pours out some sand from his pouch, knowing that this beer is going to be a little lighter on flavor. The time comes to make the switch. Indiana Jones grasps the cup in one hand while readying his sandbag in the other. After a deep breath, Indy makes the switch. A little of the beer splashes out onto his jacket, and he gasps in shock. After a tense moment, nothing happens, everything seems to be ok. Just then, the sandbag begins to recede down into the pedestal. OH NO! He forgot that this was Rolling Rock Extra Pale! He should have taken more sand out of his bag first! Indiana has no time to ponder his mistake, as a giant (you guessed it) rolling rock comes out of nowhere and chases him out of the temple. He'll never put macro beer on a pedestal again!

    Rolling Rock Extra Pale is a beer that I would never choose over most any other beer given the chance. That said, it is actually quite light and refreshing. If someone were to give me this beer after a long day out in the heat, I would graciously accept it. Macro beers all tend to have the same problems (lack of flavor, wateryness, etc..) and this one is no different.

Amulets and Ale Rating:

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Corona Extra - Grupo Modelo S.A. de C.V.

    Corona Extra is an Adjunct Lager brewed by Grupo Modelo S.A. de C.V. located in Mexico City, Mexico. Adjunct Lagers get their name from the adjunct grains used to cut costs in mass-production by replacing higher quality grains with cereal grains such as corn or rice.

    Corona Extra pours a light yellow color with a disappointing white foam which quickly dissipates into nothing.

    The beer itself smells slightly sweet from the malts, with a bit of a sour, corn-like scent. There is a slight hint of hops.

    Corona Extra is very light bodied, but not quite water-thin. The beer has a high level of carbonation which makes the beer seem more like a soda than a beer.

    The Lager tastes mildly of sweet malts. I was surprised to find that the beer actually does have a slight corn flavor. This corn mixed with the malt sweetness give the illusion that the beer contains corn syrup, which is very unpleasant. There is only the faintest hint of hops in the brew. With an alcohol content of 4.6% ABV, Corona Extra has absolutely no alcohol flavor or warmth.

    I find it surprising that all types of Coronas are bottled in clear glass bottles. It is a decently well known fact that sunlight damages beer and causes it to taste "skunky." When UV light hits some of the oils from hops a chemical is formed which is actually present in the defensive spray of skunks. This chemical causes a rotten, disgusting flavor in beers which are exposed to sunlight. This reaction is why most beers are bottled in brown or green glass. It is always a warning sign of a bad beer when it is bottled in clear glass.

    As is well known, the addition of a lime to the beer improves the flavor slightly, though that isn't exactly a plus for the beer itself. This is definitely a beer that should only be consumed when you can't drink the water, or after drinking numerous, better tasting, beers; if at all. To its credit, Corona Extra actually tastes better than a lot of the other mass produced macro brews on the market today, though that's not saying much.

Amulets and Ale rating: